[My brother comes walking into the room wearing this ridiculous florescent ski jacket of my father's that we always gave him the hardest time about wearing because it is so ridiculous!]
Man is it just me, or is it hot in here?

[He then proceeds to unzip the jacket to reveal that he is wearing a Boy Scout uniform shirt underneath it... you'll understand more about that as you read.]

Ladies and gentlemen, may I please have your attention. Please rise for the presentation of our colors.
[Then the doors in the back of the room open to reveal this tall stick thing surrounded by a bunch of boys.]

Color guard, advance.

[And cue the water works.]

Color guard, halt.
[The color guard is made up of three of my dearest friends, all of whom are Eagle Scouts and are part of the reason for my love of Scouts and all things related.]

Please raise your right hand in our sign for the evening and repeat after me:

[The "sign for the evening" was to make a "W" with your fingers. It's also a gang sign, if you're in to that sort of thing.]

Color guard, post the colors.

[They thought they could just walk away without getting a hug. I told them otherwise.]

[The tall one I'm hugging in the picture below--- that's my High School Sweet Heart.]

Thanks and you may be seated.

When I was asked to do this roast tonight, the first thought that came to my mind about my sister was during my time as a Boy Scout. Let’s just say my sister had a thing for men in uniform… There is nothing sexier than a bunch of prepubescent boys in their khaki shirts with all their fancy badges, short green shorts and knee high green socks… so Adam, you will always have some competition, but I know she would much rather be with you than anyone else… I mean, as I understand it, you were too pretty to be a boy while growing up, and even cuter when Sarah Jane and Katie [his cousins] made you look like the tin man with the make-up in Amber’s [his sister] kaboodle. [When they were growing up, Adam's cousins decided it would be fun to put make-up on him.]

If you have met my sister in the last few years, you have come to know her as Kate, but if you have known her for a while she was first Katy to you… Katy just wasn’t suitable for a young college girl trying to make a name for herself. As we were growing up our mom used to tell Katy that she should go by Kate because it was such a cute name and really fit her personality. [She did!] Her response was always very dramatic, “I’m a Katy, not a Kate!!” and now look what has happened… just like a typical girl, she can’t make up her mind. Look out Adam, before you know it she’ll probably be going by Katharine. Kate and I have always had nicknames for each other… some always weren’t that nice, but most of the time they were pretty funny. Lately she has been calling me LB or lil’ brudder [taken from the Strongbad sketch] I was going to call her Big Sista… but just something about the short version didn’t sit right. So I have been calling her Katy T, but I guess I will have to come up with a new one now, because she is no longer a T.

What is that? I’m sorry, this just in: the bride has lost her glasses and can’t see anymore. Hold on, I’ve got a picture of what they look like so you all can help her find them.

[When we were younger, circa 1993-4, I had these huge glasses. What? They were fashionable then. David and I went up to visit out grandparents one summer and they decided to have a picture taken of their 3 grandkids at one of those in-the-walmart type shops. They also had sweatshirts made up for our parents that say "Double Trouble." I was round, my hair was terrible and I had on those huge glasses. I hate those sweatshirts. My dad still likes to wear his. In the picture below, I'm trying to stop David from taking off his Scout shirt while Adam holds me back. This is one of my favorite pictures from the wedding.]

I have spent a lot of time in College Station over the past several years, and always wondered why the clock in the clock tower never seemed to be running right. Then I met Adam and found out he liked to disassemble clocks as a kid and put them back together and it all made sense. [Adam graduated from Texas A&M which is located in College Station] Obviously he decided he needed to tackle a bigger project than a household clock. So take this as a warning… everybody keep an eye on your watch tonight.

Kate, Anita has asked me to inform you that you might want to keep your dish washing soap far away from your laundry detergent or Adam just might use that to wash the dishes. Apparently, Dawn likes to bubble over and seep out of the dishwasher. [Adam put Dawn in the dishwasher as a child and there was quite a bubbly mess to clean up.]

Kate and I have always had a pretty close relationship growing up, and we’ve always had a kind of unspoken agreement about the people we date. She has to approve of anyone I date, and I have to approve of anyone she dates… so when Kate called to inform us that she had a new guy for me to meet, I was ready to rundown my mental checklist on him. I was pleasantly surprised when Adam showed up. He was definitely her type… tall and skinny. [See the High School Sweet Heart mentioned above...] Then as I got to know Adam myself and learned more about him from my sister, I knew he would be a great guy for her. He had the look, he was a nerdy engineer, and he seemed to take really good care of her.

Several months before Kate and Adam got engaged, Kate and I had a long discussion about how Adam had pretty much told her he was going to ask for her hand in marriage and she knew she would say yes. At that point in time I told her that she had my approval as long as she was ready to make that commitment. Well, a couple days after they got engaged, I called my sister up and said, “Kate, I really like Adam, but as your brother it’s my responsibility to ask this… is he the one?” [He really did do this.] Without hesitation, she replied, “Yes, he is everything I have been looking for.” I knew in that instant that she was ready for this day. Adam, take care of my big sister, she’s the only one I’ve got and I am excited to have you as a brother in law.

I love you both, wish you the best of luck in all you do, and may you live happily ever after.

[Like I said, it was an amazing moment. I love my little brother so much. And I have to tell you the story about the flag. Before we left the house for the Rehearsal on Friday night, my brother was getting antsy because a package he'd ordered and paid extra to have arrive early still had not arrived. Thinking it was just some equipment for his business or something like that, I paid no real attention to it, but hoped he would call the company back and get reimbursed for the rush charge. When we got home from the Rehearsal, there was a small box waiting for us on the front porch. Mom had me call him and let him know the box had arrived. Turns out, the flag pictured above was in that box. As soon as he got home, he drove over to his buddy's house to have him screen print the flag with out k+a logo. When I was told this story, it made me feel glad that I was the one who got to tell him the package arrived and it also made me realize just how much my brother loves me. He's such a great kid.]

Then the Maid of Honor.

In between the speeches, my uncle made a few remarks as well as read a “text message” from one of my other uncles who lives in Alaska and was unable to make the trip for the wedding. I am really glad we asked him to be our emcee for the evening. He did a fantastic job.

We sat at our table and enjoyed every minute of it. Little did we know what we were in for next! Come back tomorrow for what is my favorite memory of the wedding.

Our menu consisted of

• Field Greens with Balsamic Vinaigrette
• Chicken with Sundried Tomato Cream Sauce
• Pasta Primavera
• Squash Medley
• Green Beans
• Mashed Potatoes
• Rolls

We got to sit down and catch our breath for a minute or two while we ate. I don’t remember much about the food, just that I ate some and it was good. I wish we would’ve taken some with us to the hotel because I woke up starving in the middle of the night and made the Mister go down to the car and get me some crackers leftover from the bride’s room snacks.

S&MBF loves this picture of him eating dinner.

When it was time, each bridesmaid/man and groomsman paired up and entered the room while my uncle read their bios. I got this idea from a girlfriend of mine. I thought it was really neat when she did this at her wedding reception. Here is my brother and the Mister’s sister:

Each pair stood up on the dance floor and waited while the next pair entered and had their bios read. In hindsight, the bios were a bit long, but it was fun to let the audience know who our wedding party was and how we knew them.

The crowd patiently waiting the arrival of the newlyweds:

And finally, last but definitely not least, ladies and gentlemen please rise and give a warm around of applause for Mr and Mrs ThatOneGirl!

And lots of hugs and kisses.

The Mister and I escaped to the staircase that led up to the bride’s room to hide from the well wishers exiting the sanctuary and to have a couple minutes alone as newly weds.

Once the crowd had died down and we took a few more pictures in the sanctuary, we got in the car and were driven to the reception. Remember to buckle up for safety!

Because you need another shot of us kissing, here we are kissing in the back of the car:

Said our vows (yes, I made it thru without too much trouble):

Then it was time for our unity ceremony. I was inspired to do something a little bit different. I wanted to do a unity tree. We had our parents bring soil from the homes we grew up in which they added to the vessel. Then the Mister and I watered the tree:

We wanted to incorporate a few Catholic traditions from the Mister’s side of the family and the rose ceremony was quite appropriate:

You may kiss the bride!

Introducing Mr and Mrs ThatOneGirl!

Four months later and I still can’t believe I’m married.

My cousin walking down the aisle to start the procession:

The mothers:

The Ministers, the Mister and the Best Man:

Team Kate!

After Team Kate, the flower girl and ring boy made their way down the aisle, the ceremony coordinator closed the doors at the back of the sanctuary and Dad and I stepped into place. The organist started to play the Bridal March. I wanted to count to 10 before I told them to open the door to add a bit of drama, but by the time I made it to 6 I was ready to go.

After we made it to the front of the church, my father presented me to be married.

We mounted the stairs and the ceremony began.

The Future Mrs and Mr:

What you can’t tell from these pictures is that I was so cold and sick that I almost passed out a couple times while we shooting.

Me with my parents, brother and grandparents:

The Mister with his parents, sister and grandparents:

With our honor attendants:

With the extended wedding party- attendants, flower girl, ring boy, acolyte, ushers and friend of honor:

After the ceremony we had our families stick around to do one big photo. Most of the Mister’s family is represented, but a good chunk of mine is missing. Yes, our families are HUGE.

When it was time, I stuck my head out the door to make sure he was in the correct location and not looking at me!

When everyone was in their spot, I turned the corner and walked up the ramp. I started to cry as I walked towards him.

I put my hand on his shoulder.

And just said hello.

He turned around and we each got a good look at each other.

Of course we had to kiss.

I call this the heritage shot. This is the picture we will pass down to our children and grandchildren. It’s classic and timeless.

We took a couple pictures together in the garden outside the church. This one is definitely one of my favorites.

With about two and a half hours to go until the ceremony, it was time to start putting on our faces and getting ready.

S&MBF looks sharp in his tux and tie!

And now for the dress. Mom left the salon and ran home to change in to her (fabulous!) dress and met us at the church with my dress. She came upstairs to help me get in it.

It’s quite a challenge getting into that thing and still being a bit modest. We didn’t get a picture of my mom crawling up under the dress to pull down some of the lining to make the front fall just right.

I must confess, those boobs aren’t mine. But they sure do look fantastic! The seamstress I worked with for the alterations suggested putting in some padding to help fill out that area. We’ll just keep that our little secret.

A few more tucks, some fashion tape here and there to hold it in place.

And here she is, the bride:

Oh, and don’t forget those awesome blue shoes!